I have not been around in a bit. But looking at my stats, no one’s missed me.

It is the holiday season and as I live in Sunny South FL, the snowbird season as well. As much shit as I talk about snowbirds, more so when I am alone in my vehicle driving to work, I have no doubt that one day I, too, will be one of them. That’s how my life likes to play out. I have evidence of this, but that would bring up a really long tangent and I am too tired for that at this moment.

The other night I was looking at photos on Facebook of my friends. Particularly the ones with kids. Which really is all of them. And I realized something… they look older than me. And technically, for some, I am older than them. So it had me wondering, does having a child age you physically? I mean if I was one of those women who invested in skin care and manicures and pedicures and hair treatments to keep my youthful appearance, I wouldn’t question this. But I don’t. I am lucky if I wash my makeup off at night before bed. My hair care is boxed dye from walmart, shampoo and conditioner via Pantene, and a mousse I use sometimes if I’m feeling fancy.

And maybe it’s not just physically. Maybe there is a kind of maturity with being a mother that I may never know. I seriously still feel 18 at the age of 32. I mean at least with some things. I handle my bills, I can discipline myself to clean the house, I’m a responsible employee and I was super mature as a kid. My group considered me the “mom” aka the Killjoy. I remember one time at the movies where I felt this the most. We were probably 11 or 12 and the theatre was empty. My two friends decided it would be fun to start throwing popcorn everywhere. Then when the movie was taking a while to start rolling, one of them thought it would be cool to climb on the seat to try to see into the little window above. I always wanted to make sure I didn’t get in trouble so that was my thing. Don’t climb the seat! Stop throwing your damn popcorn! Who are you people??

I don’t know. What I do know is I rarely play mother today (i.e. I haven’t babysat for my friends in a couple of years) and it’s kinda nice. Kids are fun – at some ages – but my dogs are cooler.

Posted by:Sarah N. Quinn

I don't think I really identify with the term blogger. When blogger comes to mind I think of well curated posts and sponsored content. I basically run this how I ran my LiveJournal 15 years ago - as an online diary. I don't curate my content, I wake up each morning and peck away at my keyboard with a thought or feeling about something. And this is the result of that.

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